The Child Within

The child within is our inner sense and our innocence that remains unpolluted by the residue of unfavorable experience.

As she stood at the edge of the stage her eyes glanced over the crowd as if she was seeking the approval of someone before she continued her performance. The events of her life seemed to all build up to this very moment as past events flashed before her eyes like a movie that only she could see. The familiar voice of her mother encouraging her to do her best echoed inside of her head as she drifted further away from the moment. The angry sound of her father's voice soon followed as it always did. "Comedy is not a job. Go make something valuable of yourself." His words were etched into her brain providing both a mental block and a stepping stone for success. She silently resented him more than he will ever know. Her desire for his support for years held more weight than her own convictions. As a child she was always good spirited and attention hungry. She would captivate the room with her jokes and her contagious laugh. Her energy seemed to have a disagreeable effect upon her fathers serious and melancholy nature. For him success could only be achieved through hard labour. His attitude was very stern and overbearing as his presence brought an invisible storm cloud wherever he went. As she got older she began to take her comedy more serious and she made a firm decision to grace the world with her joyous spirt through her jokes, natural charm and wit. She concealed this goal from her father expecting his disapproval as she continued to go through the motions of the college experience eventually dropping out to do stand up at the local night scene. She spent hours watching her favorite comedians and learning from each of them to perfect her craft. Her routine improved and she received a warm welcome as she followed the positive reputation she created for herself. This night was however different as it was the anniversary of  her fathers death which happened to fall on the night of her biggest performance to date. At each venue she would scan the crowd with her eyes before her performance anticipating his arrival while knowing deep inside that he would never be there. This night however was different as anxiety began to grip her tighter than she held the microphone in her left hand. This was her first televised performance and she was extremely nervous. Suddenly a sense of reassurance washed over her like a cool breeze. She could feel her father watching even in death and for once he was pleased by her achievement. This thought brought her great comfort as she proceeded to give the best performance of her life. Later that night she sat with her proud mother who told her that her father had a difficult life. "Your father was very bitter and held strong resentment towards the circumstances of his life in an unforgiving society. He felt that since he had to work from a young age to survive and take care of a large family that everyone should do the same. He once had dreams of being a famous guitarist, you know." her mother told her with a nostalgic smile as she reminisced on better times with the man she loved. "The conditions of his life did not permit him to follow his goals and so his lack of encouragement towards you were based in his fears of your failure. He never wanted you to feel like he did and I used to tell him that you were different. Before he passed he smiled at told me he was so proud of you for sticking to your aspirations." she said in a loving tone.
 The inner child is the purity within us all. It is the sincerity and innocence in a child's eyes that trusts unconditionally. It is the look of adventure and exploration with each new discovery of this fascinating world. It is the part of us that we must always protect and never deny. Our inner child loves to have fun and enjoy learning new things. It seeks attention for our gifts to nurture our ability to express what we have been blessed with. Our sense of true love and creativity is located in the heart of our inner child. Often in childhood we are faced with sudden events that may traumatize us since we do not understand what has happened or why it has occurred. This creates psychological barriers and doors in our subconscious that we keep locked hoping to never be reminded of what has transpired in fear of reliving the experience. These hidden fears are often triggered by people, places and events that remind us of something that has scarred the child within us. The longer these wounds go untreated the more difficult it becomes to function properly as adults. Those who have a healthy inner child move forward with a positive attitude and continue hoping for the best while the unhealthy inner child is left coping with the rest. By not removing these blockages and dealing with these issues we begin to deny that they exist. We become the cold hardened disciplinarian that we once regarded as strict and boring. In time we begin to lose the vibrant life force that keeps us living, loving and learning. In time we begin to suppress our natural desire to enjoy life as we succumb solely to our responsibilities and daily routines. The inner child begins to cry out within us and we respond back in our own minds like the strict parent telling them to wait and denying their genuine needs. The way we deal with our inner child directly impacts our vision for the future for it is the child who sees no limits and boundaries. It is the child who colors outside of the lines of society. The inner child is the true revolutionary constantly transforming through innovative ideas and new ways of seeing ourselves and our world. It is important to identify the nature of your inner child and give them what they need from your inherent masculine and feminine energy. The inner child needs discipline but not at the price of encouragement. It needs to be nurtured and loved as well as enlightened and guided. Find where your inner child is hiding and set it free by facing past events that it may be trapped in. It is also important to be able to identify the child within others. Often what is perceived as an attack from others is their way of defending the child inside of them. Once you heal this part of you find out the interests and gifts of your inner child and you will discover the purpose of your life's journey. Carrying the inner child through the ups and downs of life is like walking around the world holding a candle that you cannot allow to burn out. The inner child is your olympic torch passed down from the sun to deliver the fire of your passion as a gift to humanity. Hold it high and keep it burning as bright as you can.

Kalik Scientific

Social Networth

"If you can satisfy the psychological needs of humanity in a world of fantasy everyone will immediately invest in real estate in their imagination."

She woke up to the sound of an alert on her phone immediately signing on to her online account to check her messages on her desktop computer. Eyes still half open she read what she could make out through her blurry vision. With 30 minutes left before she was scheduled to work she allocated 10 minutes to driving, 5 minutes to getting dressed and the other 15 to both eating and checking her online accounts simultaneously. This being a regular routine for her made it easy for her to be prepared to leave with such little time. As she began to invest more of herself into her online presentation her physical appearance began to suffer. She began to spend more time taking the perfect bathroom picture than looking presentable in her true form. With much less feedback in the real world it is obvious how she arrived at such a decision. The occasional smile or compliment did nothing for her self esteem in comparison to a day full of thumbs up from horny strangers staring at her risque photos. Her shy nature would never allow her to be as expressive as her promiscuous online avatar. With a new name and identity she found freedom from the judgement of her real life acquaintances and friends. Along the way to her destination she couldn't resist responding to chat messages on her cell phone at every light and street in between. Finally she reached her destination and walked to her desk with one hand still stuck to the virtual keyboard of her device glancing in front of her occasionally to make sure she didn't walk into anything. After sitting down at her desk she started up her computer and spent the day balancing her work with hiding the pop up windows of multiple social networks from her nosy supervisor who was ironically doing the same thing unbeknownst to her. At last it was time to go home and join the online party with her cyber friends free from interruption.

Welcome to the cyber world of mafia wars, farmville gardens, digital love and on screen theme parks where you can mentally enjoy the ups and downs of your imagination. In a world always on the brink of war where death, destruction, ignorance, trauma and famine abounds the value of escapism is going through the roof. In the arena where drugs, alcohol, sex and TV have been regarded as champions for so long a new contender has overcome all three in the caged match of society. Who is this new undefeated fighter winning the minds and hearts of societies inner children? It is the social network where one becomes part of a community of people that only exist through online communication connected by wires and electric current. This allows people to live through a surrogate avatar and present their ideal version of what others will find attractive. The impact of this phenomenon is apparent as some of these networks boast a membership that rivals many countries. It seems as if we are all the president of a corporation in which we build up friends and followers instead of customers and likes and retweets instead of revenue. Millions seek to find their place at the top of the aspiring instant musicians of Myspace, video stars of youtube, Twitter celebrities, Linkedin businesses and Facebook icons. Social networking can be a powerful tool to share our experiences and ideas while gaining valuable and not so valuable feedback. It is a great way to connect with people who share a common vision and move toward a united goal. Certainly it is a place for the independent artist to spread their gospel and the small business owner to expand their business. These unfortunately are the minority amongst the attention hungry and socially deprived characters seeking the spotlight. Each one of these different platforms caters to a unique psychological condition. The users of Facebook pour out everything from their deepest thoughts to the current frustrations awaiting others to like what they say to satisfy their ego. Users flaunt the status of their relationship which becomes more valuable to some than a diamond wedding ring. Millions of groups are started spearheading social causes and political agendas. The use of the term friend to describe the connection between users has almost replaced it's original definition. Many now consider friendship to be a button click away as true friendship is destroyed by the dreaded add friend message after visiting a page you thought you were connected to. Major brands that have been etched in the minds of generations are forced to put a join us on Facebook sign on their doors to be considered official by the social network generation. The psychology of the Twitter user is aimed at the desire to worship and be worshipped as an icon. Idolatry at its finest is certainly the underlying motive here. The use of the term follower for the people you interact with suggests an imbalanced relationship rooted in self esteem issues. To build up a as many as followers as possible with no qualification of leadership is the goal. To accept yourself as a follower is a requirement to be noticed. The initial selling point of this site is the inquisitive fan wanting to know what his favorite celebrity is eating for breakfast and what they are doing at any given moment. This opened the door for all who desired to be in the position of the individual who attracts this kind of inquiry from others. There are certainly positive ways in which this platform can be used as well as it is one of the fastest ways to spread information and thus has been the revolutionary vehicle of choice. This can be seen in China, Iran, Egypt, Libya and others a a tool for social change and political upheaval. All tools has the potential to be used in beneficial as well as detrimental ways that will reflect the mentality of its users. More than anything there is an eminent danger of people finding the mental and emotional satisfaction in a place that exists only within our own collective on screen fantasy. This addictive path can potentially lead to a great decrease in personal interaction resulting in a greater loss of humanity. The internet serves as an artificial network connection between our thoughts as the computer simulates the function of the more complex human brain. The wireless telepathic connection between us is becoming dormant as it is replaced by a less efficient system of wires and computer programming. As people become more comfortable with sitting behind a digital mask they become less secure and comfortable with who they truly are leading humanity further down the road of insecurity, illusion, falsehood and unhealthy egotism. For those of us who see this happening we are given no choice but to log into the matrix to find each other and pull out those who have awakened to their own reality. The conspiracy theorists must look no further than the world wide web where the new world is online waiting for its next order. Use your avatar but don't become it or you risk being trapped in the web. You have real world value that is untapped. When the gold rush begins and man seeks his wealth in the dark cave of his own consciousness where will you be? In the free world or still plugged in. The voice is yours.

Celebri-tease

"Everybody is a star you just didn't know you are. Now you know it's right on time to show the world how bright you shine."

 He took one last glance in the mirror to confirm the perfection of his appearance. Narcissistic to some yet necessary in his profession. "Move fast you have about 3 minutes to get to the stage. It's packed out there and the crowd is getting restless." his manager said with a sense of playful urgency. After many years he is still not accustomed to the dreamlike reality he has become a central part of. Hands still moist with sweat like the mist of a light rain as the subtle feeling of anxiety has never fully left. Walking with an entourage of security he passed by a seemingly endless sea of screaming fans. "We love you!" They yelled at the top of their lungs just hoping to get a split second of his attention. The slightest eye contact would be enough to last a lifetime. A somewhat humble man in light of his success he would always stop and shake a few hands to acknowledge his appreciation for without them none of this would exist. Often someone would faint as he extended his arm and this day was no different. He liked to pick out the quiet ones he knew were too shy to reach out for him. As he stepped close to the target of his attention they young woman passed out as if he hit her with the full force of his might. Something about this never felt right although his ego soaked itself in the pleasurable high of his overwhelming significance.
   She took one last glance in the mirror hoping to see something more pleasing than what she was accustomed to after spending a considerable amount getting her hair done. She took a couple of hours putting the finishing touches on her makeup after carefully selecting her finest outfit for the concert. It is not that she is an unattractive young lady but you would be hard pressed trying to convince her that. Her father being a strict disciplinarian and temperamental alcoholic was never one for giving her compliments. Her mother suffering from low self esteem accepted her fathers abuse and unconsciously passed on her lack of self worth to her quiet yet beautiful daughter. Always feeling empty within she sought to decorate her appearance yet it never filled the void inside. Very intelligent and an excellent writer she learned early on that society didn't give any gold stars to encourage her nerdy capabilities. Surrounded by the objects of her admiration posters of her favorite singers, movie stars and public figures adorned her walls. She would fall asleep staring at their pictures imagining herself in their place. Tonight however was special for she was preparing to see her favorite artist perform. She saved up for months to attend with her best friends who acquired front row tickets to what they considered to be an opportunity of a lifetime. After their arrival they waited in utter excitement for about 45 minutes laughing about her crush on the center of attention for the evening. Her best friend said I"I'm gonna scream until he comes over here and tell him how much you love him." She responded under her breath with a faint "No don't do that." secretly hoping that her friend would carry through with her plan. As he approached she nervously began to smile and tear simultaneously overwhelmed by the excitement. She hid partially behind her friend wanting to be both noticed and ignored. Her friend made good on her promise whom he overlooked to make eye contact and reach toward the girl who succumbed to her nervous excitement passing out in her friends arms.
   We have all either experienced directly or observed the fanaticism caused by the exploitation of the celebrity image. This has become living idolatry at its finest. The irony is that we are worshipping the inherent qualities we all possess embodied in a handful of individuals. Not that one should not be appreciated and credited for their hard work and talent but at what price. For years this has occurred at the high cost of collective self esteem. The majority psychologically conditioned  to be considered inferior by others and most importantly themselves. Their is certainly an intentional plan to promote the significance of entertainment above all else. This becomes obvious when you notice the wide disparity between the average NBA players salary of $5 million and the presidents salary of $400,000. How are the teachers of our children considered less important than those who entertain them. A healthy civilization must place a great emphasis on the artist, inventor, educator, farmer, scientist, healer as well as the entertainer. We must take a serious look at the message we are sending our children when there seems to be more of an incentive to play sports and sing songs than there is to own a business and be educated.  As a result of carefully selecting a few individuals for the majority to worship the already lowered self esteem of the majority takes an even greater hit. To make matters worse we are not told that these celebrities are not even required to possess talent and now everyone is jumping on the reality TV bandwagon to be noticed. The floodgates of insecurity have been opened to exploit the average persons desire for fame and notoriety. Most don't even want to be the celebrity now to be appreciated for their natural ability. They want the attention and the material wealth they are falsely told that comes with the position. The irony of this is that everyone is important and by chasing after another shooting star we miss the one within us. We all were given a purpose as well as a variety of individual gifts, skills and talents to pursue our goals and achieve our own concept of success. Heaven has many doors in which we may enter our inner paradise yet we are told there is only one way in with the same blind men guarding its gates. As a result there is a long line of people ready to give up their very souls to be used as a puppet figure dressed in a glamourous disguise used as bait to attract others willing to do the same.
    We are all stars shining in our own space. No one shines with the same intensity or duration yet we all are beings of divine light. Our very form is a condensed body of light since we first arrived on a ray of sunlight. Our very bodies are composed of the carbon, nitrogen and oxygen atoms that form the stars we admire in the night sky.  From every atom in our body to all life on earth we are the living remains of cosmic bodies of light. In fact we are not only stars but a microcosm of the very universe we are a part of.  Let this truth resonate within your spirit and rebuild the value and appreciation for who you truly are.  A celebrity is one who deserves to be celebrated for their achievements first within their own development and then their positive impact upon humanity. A celebration is meant to commemorate a significant event. As we are constantly expanding we are an ongoing event appearing to be a still form. So do not allow yourself to be celebri-teased by the false idol who appears to have what you do not. Instead discover the boundless treasure within you and as your self worth increases so will the intensity of your light. Everybody is a star you just didn't know you are. Now you know it's right on time to show the world how bright you shine.

Knock yourself doubt!

"In most cases abuse is a self inflicted punishment carried out by the hands of others."

He despises the work he does to make a living yet he has been in his cab every night for the last 25 years driving around the same city. He knows it all so well that he could do every run with his eyes closed knowing every street the veins on his own hand. Passing by faces that are all too familiar. He remembers glancing in his rear view mirror and seeing a younger man in his reflection. Fresh dreams of traveling the world and seeing new places. He spoke of it so often all of his regular passengers would ask "Hey Frank when are you going to take that trip?" His response would follow in his familiar low tone  "One of these days i'm gonna be gone."  For years he would arrive home at dawn resting for much his day. He would rely on the company of his customers since his schedule did not allow much of a social life. He would drag his feet every afternoon yet somehow his sense of duty and loyalty made it difficult to leave. His entire lifestyle trapped around this meaningless pattern of events. He would watch the partygoers, businessmen, artists, musicians and families interact  feeling a sense of unimportance compared to their busy lives. Yet worst of all tortured by the lovers who affectionately embraced in his backseat. A feeling he knew he would never have. So heartbroken by loneliness, stressed by despair and burdened by lost dreams he was eventually found hunched over in his car after a sudden severe heart attack. He certainly kept his word for one day he was gone.
   This situation presents the sorrow of a man abused by his own sense of duty to that which had no return investment. Allowing ourselves to remain trapped in our own fears is psychologically abusive. We watch our dreams die slowly to give life to someone else's vision and gain nothing in the process. At least we think we gain nothing if we fail to recognize the lesson in our experiences. There is also the matter of perception in which our desire for something else can blind us from all that is valuable in our past and present. This feeling of torture and dutiful imprisonment may bring a sense of freedom and peace to a lonely office worker who would enjoy the breeze of the open road. Thus we should always recognize the benefit of our circumstance while continuously seeking higher ground. Psychological abuse is not the only form of abuse for some are burdened by their own emotion or the emotions of others.
    I recall a close friend of mine who met a young woman who he sincerely cared about and they eventually had a few beautiful children together. Their initial happiness became a silent suffering feeling trapped in a world of emotional instability. She began to secretly resent their relationship for not being in alignment with her personal aspirations. Over time this resentment became anger and rage directed inwardly but primarily at him. Unable to diagnose his presence being the source of her frustration he blindly pushed forward ignoring all of the signs. She did everything she could to push him out of their home including making his stay there less than desirable yet he endured hopelessly holding on to the memory of what they once were. Eventually he naturally became angered by her treatment towards him. In time she expressed her true feelings yet his attachment to their ideal relationship became a roadblock to acceptance of what she expressed to him. Years of misery soon followed as they played the cat and mouse game of chasing and attacking each other becoming the target of their counterparts frustration, resentment and anger. Dumping years of emotional trauma on each other with no regard for the fact that they were trapped in a cycle of self victimization. The solution became so apparent by anyone on the outside looking in yet they found slight comfort in the eye of their storm. Selfishly their emotional residue polluted the environment for their children who became infected by it resulting in behavioral issues in school. The emotional abuse is particularly dangerous because it blocks the flow of healthy energy and is contagious to all without a strong emotional defense system. It will eventually destroy you from the inside out and cause depression, stress, anxiety and other issues that will become physical and lower the quality of life. Emotional abuse tends to outlive the situation that caused it and becomes harder to remove the longer it goes untreated. We begin to lie to ourselves about our self worth. We convince ourselves that we deserve to be treated as less than human. We may even abuse ourselves by being trapped in someone else's emotional condition. Our sympathy can cause us to dedicate our time and energy to pulling someone out of this condition who refuses to and in time we ignore the fact that we are being pulled deeper into the same condition. Know that you deserve nothing but the best and can do nothing to force someone out of self destruction. You can only remind someone of the potential of their worth and do your best to inspire them from a safe distance outside the boundary of their polluted aura.
    The most obvious and easily detectable forms of abuse is the physical. This is seen in the woman wearing sunglasses on a cloudy day to hide her black eyelids and the man concealing the scars on his back and arms where his skin lies under his partners fingernails. Yet their guilt and suffering bonds them in ways most could never understand. Their quiet loyalty making it impossible to even reveal their plight concerned about the well being of someone with no regard for their health and safety. Yet neither has the power to walk away physically and so they leave in their mind for a better place only known by them. This is the boxer who in his age can no longer risk a blow to the wrong place. The thousands of hits to the face and head. The bruised ribs and forgotten medals lost in a legacy soon abandoned by the next great fighter. Somehow his ego will not allow him to leave at the height of his career so he continues to fight the less qualified to keep his name relevant. Of course this strategy works to his advantage as his fans and critics taunt him to fight someone worth the challenge of what he used to be in his younger days. The image of a former champion permanently branded into the minds of the world who refuse to recognize his inability to function at the level he once did. One day he accepts a fight with a young up and coming fighter to prove once and for all that he is the greatest of all time like so many before him. He fights with the heart of a man who has everything to lose against an individual with the world to gain. He endures round after round of punishment. In his ear he is encouraged by his corner to quit while he is ahead which of course he refuses to do for it would be considered defeat in his mind. He is unexpectedly hit by a swift combination that sends his 190 lb. frame crashing to the mat like a demolished building. This fight cost him not only his reputation but his ability to function normally due to extensive brain damage from a lengthy career of taking blows to the head. Beneath his confident strong exterior he was tired of fighting. Subconsciously he knew the risk of continuing yet he feared he would no longer be relevant. Truthfully his last fight with an opponent was years ago and every fight since then became a battle of self importance with his own ego. Be careful of the abuse you allow whether it is mental, emotional, physical or otherwise. Know that you do have the power to make it end by building up your self worth. What you think you are gaining is nothing in comparison to what you will gain in peace, health and harmony. You must always take self accountability for how others treat you for in most cases you sign a mental contract of silent permission based upon what you will allow yourself to tolerate.

Silent Treasure beneath Quiet Storms

"what you don't say will be spoken for you in the minds of the impatient, worrisome and unwise to whom silence is a fools gold."

Silence is truly golden and worth every sound that is heard. It is this great ocean of silence that we fish out every word we utter. The sea of ideas  in which our deepest treasures are buried. Each of us live a separate life of isolation and solitude that no one will ever truly know. Regardless to how vocal some may be the majority of our thoughts are always unspoken. Others can only assume and take the pieces of what you reveal to fill in the blanks. Life is a constant process of growth and development where the majority of change goes on internally and remains unseen by those who judge you solely on their limited perception of your former actions. Knowing this one must recognize the dual responsibility of your appearance. You must be careful with every action, word, gesture and component of your presentation. Others will then assess you and filter your image through their historic lens which then becomes you re-presentation. It is this process that you will never have complete control over. You can only do the best with the responsibility of what you present. People store memories of associations between descriptive words and the people, places and events they attach to them. This is the minds cache which stores this information like cookies in your computer browser to quickly make connections to identify and process new information. Thus what you present is pre sent so everyones reputation precedes them via their similar characteristics with those who you remind others of. For example one may see a rock that appears different in size, texture and color from anything they have seen before yet they immediately define it as a rock based upon it's familiar appearance. This is the same process of identity profiling that happens with everyone you meet in life. Often there is a degree of inaccuracy due to the fact that no one is you besides you.
             Eventually as we become more familiar with individuals and places we adjust our perception accordingly and fill in the blanks not provided by our associative memory. However some make less adjustments and rarely update their files. I myself recall meeting people and identifying them with others who they remind me of only to attach adjectives to their person that were undeserved. I also remember times when someone revealed themselves to be precisely what I anticipated with the exception of what was unknown to me. This is a process of natural defense aiding in rapid response and quicker reaction time. Having a characteristic seed memory bank allows one to react faster to a potential problem or quickly take advantage of a possible opportunity. Thus through the silent observation of others you will always be spoken for. Knowing this you must plan your silence more than you plan what is spoken. Trust that others will think more of you than what you have revealed to them. They will have ideas about you that your actions may have never implied. They will speak of your decisions in ways that you never intended. They will make every assumption in their book yet you must never compromise your honor in how you present yourself. You should always be sincere and express the higher characteristics of your authentic nature.  You will always hurt people you have never intended to and benefit others you may not be aware of. Actions do speak louder than words yet silence whispers volumes in the ears of men. Listen carefully to the silence and you will hear the sound before it arrives. Yet do not allow the message in the silence to become lost in translation and polluted by a tarnished filter.
          Silence is suggestive and mysterious like the objects in a shadow. It is a psychologically seductive influence sought after by the inquisitive mind. To choose when to play the notes in a song one must consider the equal value of the silence which emphasizes what is heard. Interestingly enough the silence permeates through everything like the darkness at night. It is not attributed to an apparent  source as light is. One does not see the root of the dark matter of space yet we can trace the rays of light back to their celestial body of energy known as stars, comets and planets. This darkness is unseen as silence is unheard  thus it is not so easy to pinpoint the source of a sea of thoughts as it is to identify what is spoken and by whom. On a mundane scale let us look at the celebrity. The celebrity is called a star and is focused on because of the attention directed on the way they shine. This then brings attention to the contrast of the sea of darkness surrounding them which lends to our curiosity of everything we don't see. This interest is then exploited upon by those who claim to know what is considered speculation which becomes rumor followed by scandal and transforming their image and possibly their character. Most people will assume the worst in others in order to falsely raise their own worth. We will never know what truly  goes on behind the scenes yet we will never stop wondering. Some will have 2 pieces to the puzzle and then draw the rest and spread it as fact. This is the power of silence. Use yours wisely and be careful how you receive the silence of others. It is best to fish from the purest water in your subconscious  so that your best ideas will spring forth. Walk in your own shadow to understand the totality of your potential effect on the world around you. People have a value that increases and decreases based upon how they benefit others so be careful of fools gold and listen carefully to the hidden treasure of silence. Do not assume the worst for after all things may be better than you know.

-from the brilliant thoughts of Kalik Scientific-

Time for some Action!

" To repeat the problems you are already aware of will only amplify them while revealing your unwillingness to act. "

I am tired of this. I don't want to go through this anymore. I can't keep doing this. We have all expressed sentiments such as these at one time or another. We have all listened patiently to the dissatisfaction of others knowing they will most likely follow the same pattern that brought them there. Often we insist that we can't take it anymore yet that is precisely what we will continue to do. Why do we continue to walk down the same dead end street and then complain about an outcome we already anticipated. The answer is simply that the expression of dissatisfaction is not what it appears to be. What is truly happening is that we become comfortable in our routines and the problems we know are not as bad as the ones we don't. As long as we speak our unhappiness we empower our displeasure. I remember once working at a job that made me miserable for 7 years yet how unhappy could I have really been to remain there for so long. It wasn't until I lost the fear of the unknown that I was able to let go of what was known. Satisfaction is a matter of comparison. One must know what it is to be content in order to know the feeling of discontent. Thus it is the unsatisfactory that makes the satisfactory more pleasant. The reality is that most people are unwilling to make the changes necessary to cure their mental, emotional and physical ailments. For example I once spoke to an elderly man who recently had a heart attack. He was rushed to the hospital and immediately went into surgery. The sides of his face curled in misery just telling me the story of how they shaved him in order to put a camera inside of him above his genital area to his heart to see what was going on internally. After discovering that his arteries were blocked he was told they would have to insert a stent in order to save his life. A stent is a small tube used to keep the artery open. He told me that it was a miserable experience that he cared not to repeat but it was likely if he didn't change his diet he would be back to get another one in his left artery. I asked him if he made the necessary dietary adjustments and his answer was "no way. I can't stop enjoying my fast food." This response made me question the validity of his dissatisfaction. Certainly the cause of his pain came with a pleasure he was unwilling to let go even if it cost him his life. What he didn't know is that it is very possible to enjoy the pleasure of good tasting food without putting his health at risk. Yet is this unknown factor he was unwilling to open his mind to that trapped him with the only option of poisoning himself to death. This one situation caused me to look at many other psychological parallels in our every day life. I once knew a young woman who was with a man who physically abused her regularly. She eventually came to me for help and I accompanied her to the station to file a restraining order since it was inevitable that he would return to her domicile. It was not even a full weak later before new bruises appeared on her face. It became apparent that either she either enjoyed being treated this way or she feared letting go into the unknown. The most obvious examples are the dissatisfied partners who tell everyone they need to separate yet they never take the first step toward independence. After experiencing this pattern in my life and the lives of close associates I sought to understand the unseen force that binds us to our misery yet allows us to recognize our unhappiness. How can one know the problem so well yet feel so powerless to change it? What is it that humanity is holding onto in the empty places of our mind. It dawned on me that the more people express their dissatisfaction the less likely they are to do something about it. The habitual complaint has 3 potential benefits. First they may be venting to release the negative energy and lighten the emotional load so they may continue on hoping the situation resolves itself. Second they sincerely want to make a change and they are talking themselves into it while seeking advice to empower  decision they are too weak to make alone. Third they actually enjoy the feeling of being victimized and the sympathetic ear that comes with it. Self victimization can be a powerful psychological and emotional addiction. I began to notice this on a larger scale with underprivileged and oppressed people. After their oppressor gets up they still feel their weight on them spiritually and have become accustomed to using their weight as an excuse to remain down since it is the easiest option requiring no work on their part. Many become reliant upon their crutches and use them as an excuse to never walk on their own even though it is very possible with a strong will and dedication they could most likely run faster than ever before. True change comes with a subtle and silent motion that others will barely notice until it occurs. You will know when you have had enough misery because there will be nothing to say. Your actions will truly speak for you. Complaints fuel the vehicle of corrective action yet your will will spark the ignition and your focus and perseverance will keep you driven on a higher path.

Balance of Power

"Never become so caught up in trying to control others that you lose control of yourself."

He knew the rules he was hired to enforce with his very life conflicted with his moral fiber yet he found it too difficult to resist the collective force of  adrenaline filled bodies moving like a dark cloud over the unwitting crowd. Every  cell in his body felt the inescapable urge to remove the heavy armor of his swat uniform weighing on his weary soul. The aggressive voice of his superior officer rang in his helmet ricocheting off the walls inside his cranium. The concerns for his own safety soon washed away in a sea of testosterone. "Everyone leave the premises immediately." he screamed with an authoritative tone at the peaceful protestors. Refusing to move the crowd maintained their stance fully aware of what would soon follow. As his fellow officers moved forward with a feeling of personal insult towards the crowds civil disobedience he experienced a sudden paralysis as he made eye contact with a young child who's cold stare penetrated his armor and his flesh burning his spirit. A this moment he reflected upon the conversation with his partner earlier that morning in which they both adamantly agreed with the plight of the people who they knew they would be placed in opposition to later that day. They both laughed at the irony of their conundrum expressing apparent dissatisfaction at the insufficient compensation for such a dangerous mission. Suddenly he snapped back into the present moment as his heart raced knowing he had to act immediately.  Wanting desperately to find relief from his current dilemma he moved forward dragging his legs as if he was walking through drying cement. Holding his shield tight he moved through the looming cloud of tear gas like a musician in a nostalgic video shoot. His body seemed to have a mind of its own as he followed the lead of his unit swinging his night stick at anyone who dared to have the courage to remain in the vicinity. As the smoke began to subside along with the tension of the conflict he saw a small body along the side of the street. He walked closer as he began to recognize the shadowy figure appearing lifeless along the curb. It couldn't be what it appeared to be he thought as it became clear it was the same child he made  eye contact with earlier. Suddenly an unexplainable feeling took hold of his being as he remembered seeing this child before but where he could not recall until it hit him like a wrecking ball striking an abandoned building. This was his son's friend laying there. He knelt down beside him and broke down internally as his partner walked over placing his hand on his shoulder. "A shame isn't it that these things must happen. If they just learned to follow orders." he said in a cold tone void of humanity.
   We all seek love, acceptance, appreciation, companionship and a sense of purpose. In the mundane world created by the collective mind of a society convinced of its lack of power most accept a mediocre version of themselves. The soul of the individual never truly accepts this deficiency of self value and seeks a greater influence on its surroundings. This urge is in direct conflict with the ingrained concept that this power is not inherent and thus can only be achieved by pulling from an external source. Everything seeks it's own internal balance as well as  a natural equilibrium with its environment. To this man is no exception unbeknownst to him. As humanity has lost awareness of its place in the grand scheme of things we have felt less significant. This lack of importance has resulted in irrational and senseless behavior as we search for self assurance in everything but where it can be truly found. Hunting and destroying to gain a sense of power that is never fulfilled by such means. Some seek dictatorship in personal relationships to compensate for what they are lacking inside. Others seek to climb the career ladder not to fulfill a sense of accomplishment and ambition but to look down on all who appear to be in positions of inferiority. Some seek to deplete the connection to natural resources to limit self sufficiency to increase dependency thereby feeding the insatiable appetite of a malnourished ego. Some beat and belittle their offspring to please their need to feel in power even to the point they discourage their greatest potential in fear of a future feeling of inferiority. This mentality on a smaller or larger scale leads to more imbalance, disease, violence and cruelty. This downward spiral must stop so I will tell you what has been kept secret from you. The power you seek has been hidden in the one place you were told never to look and that is within you. Self, confidence, esteem, and appreciation can only be given by the self. Encourage the greatest qualities in others and know that what they need and deserve is no different than what you seek. No one can take away your power. They can only convince you that you don't have any if you allow it. The only one you are given complete jurisdiction over is yourself. So become balanced within and  you will find balance without.

The value of life

"Anyone who considers any object above his own being is truly amongst the living dead."

As I watch humanity blindly take daily steps toward it's own destruction there are a few questions that I can't avoid asking. Why? What is there to gain in exchange for this collective suicide? What is the reward we expect to receive in exchange for such a high price? As these thoughts dance around in my head I can't help but recognize that most have no idea of the value of what they are giving up. Life is an endless  stream of eternal energy flowing through a wide variety of forms designed to function as a whole. As individuals we are all unique in our presentation of this life force. Similar in form yet diverse in function and expression. There are many trees in this world yet none are identical. There are many rivers yet none flow along the same path following the same course. With all of the multiple living examples of the beautiful mind of the creator there is a special place in the universe for the being called man. Amongst all living representations of creation none possess the wisdom to seek the perfection of it's own nature as well as the foolishness to deny the purpose beneath its very existence. Nothing else in nature attempts to be what it is not based upon the concept of dissatisfaction. Self dissatisfaction paves the way for self destruction. Certainly there is no error in the calculation of the supreme universal architect. Thus our dissatisfaction is merely based upon a distorted perception. This occurs as a result of losing the awareness of self. Sure we know we are but we were not aware of who and why we are. That which fails to see the meaning of its very existence is certainly less willing to defend its existence. By not seeking to understand the true function of our being we begin to consider not being. We seek satisfaction in the illusion of death when there is only dissatisfaction in the reality of life. This state of mind can be so subtle that it may go unnoticed by those in possession of it yet overwhelmingly apparent in their behavior. The result manifests in two ways in which one begins to exhibit one or both of these options. Either it is expressed in an internal or external fashion. Internally one's lack of self assurance, confidence, esteem and appreciation results in self destructive routines from poor diet, bad habits, addiction, depression in addition to allowing themselves to be mistreated by others. Externally it is expressed through violence, combativeness, abuse, disrespect and selfishness. You may ask yourself how a pattern of bringing harm to others equals self destructive behavior. The answer is found in the truth that we are all one. Man cannot destroy his environment without destroying himself.  To drop a bomb anywhere on the planet is like blowing up a room in your own home. There is one life force within all living beings so how we treat others is a reflection of how we treat ourselves. The more one becomes dissatisfied with his own life the less he will value the lives of others. We must maintain the balance of self sacrifice with self preservation. We must regain the true sense of divine purpose by first remembering the significant role man plays within the universe. It is our ability to decide between opposing viewpoints that provides meaning to seemingly random events. We are truly the mind of the creator and the creation. We must remind ourselves that there will never be someone like us ever again. We will never have the same opportunity twice to truly live and take advantage of each and every breath. To improve ourselves and learn all we can through our unique living experience increasing the understanding of our collective awareness. Surely if we knew how valuable we truly are it would be seen as insanity to place a higher value on any material object. No inanimate object has the ability to shape it's own destiny. The brightest jewel on the earth becomes dim in comparison to the pure heart and shining intellect of man operating in his higher nature. Scarcity becomes value and nothing is more rare than the individual who cannot be duplicated. Remind yourself and others daily just how important you truly are and you will know your val-you.

Kalik Scientific